Providence, Devoid

by Kalden Dhatsenpa

Travelling the emptiness, pastures to the pavement, pavement to beaches.

An astrology website once told me that my moon sign, Sagittarius, indicated that I likely moved a significant amount as a child. Another suggested that whenever I was feeling down or confused, that I should travel to a different neighbourhood as an alternative form of therapy. “Providence, Devoid” is a personal travelogue of sorts and by extension, due to my astrological predilection, a therapeutic reflection on the void left by my father’s passing.

There was a feeling of incredulity when my family’s therapist suggested that myself and my brother had not yet processed the death of my father after ten years. How long I had been running, keeping myself busy and moving for the sake of movement.

My photography has always had a preoccupation with emptiness, though I could never quite place the simple calmness I felt in framing such emptiness. Perhaps it reminded me of the last trip I took with my father, back to his native pastoral lands in Tibet in 2011, the year he received his diagnosis. These areas were untouched by new highways that cut across the grasses. On this trip, I continued to nurture a love of photography and often the landscape there gifted me with boundless space. Something I’ve sought comfort in as my frame searched for it on later travels since his passing. Empty chairs and open skies are often my subjects. How they remind me of coming home to his room and photographing his empty bed, his back against an empty landscape.

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This road out of my father’s village was a new development since we had last visited in 2004.

The mountain overlooking Dhatsen, or the quiver of arrows, named by the Mongolian archery division that settled the area some centuries prior. Tibetans like my father have not typically carried familial names. The name was my father’s attempt at inscribing his homeland into the customs papers. Curiously enough the moon here is in Sagittarius.

My brother Dorji and my father, atop the mountain from the last photo. This visit was an attempt for my father to see his parents before they pass. A great irony.

The grasslands of my Ani and Aga

The highways of the area have led to greatly reduced travel times.

Beneath the pavement

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ABOUT THE CREATOR

Creator painting by Lucy Gill

སྐལ་ལྡན་རང་གྲོལ་མདའ་ཚན་པ།/Kalden Rangdröl Dhatsenpa is a Tibetan writer/photographer based in Karonhiatsi’kowáhne/Longueuil. He is the eldest son of Pema Yangchen Khangsar Bounding Nupe and the late nomad essayist and poet Gonpo Tsering. Kalden is an editor at Canadian Dimension, and sometimes runs as a federal candidate for the NDP in Longueuil–Charles-Lemoyne. See more of his work at kdhatsenpa.journoportfolio.com.

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